Wednesday, April 05, 2006

Blue Jello Blues

I sat on the toilet at 5 a.m. this morning. The angry buzz of my alarm clock flew circles in my sleepy head.

I was pissed.

Usually I don’t mind getting up for an early work shift. But last night I got to bed a little after midnight. I had juuuuust fallen asleep when I had a (CAWF!CHOKE!) coughing fit (HHAAAAAWWWKKK), a coughing attack (UUUUUUUUGGGGG), a coughing paroxysm (caHOOGA), that shook my every bone. When I finally did get to sleep again, I slept hard, I mean PAVEMENT hard, where your body doesn’t move and you breathe long and deep.

I sat on the toilet at 5 a.m. this morning. Pissed. Unsure why the pissiness.

Then I remembered the very last thing I was dreaming of before the alarm went off.

Then it all made sense.

Then a big shitty grin found my face.

I had a vivid dream, a very sexy dream, but it didn’t get really interesting until the end.

The End: I was in a room with three friends, 2 girls (Brunette and Blonde) and 1 guy (Guy). We were drunk, there was a party goin’ on right here, a celebration (to last throughout the year). Outside the patio door, some school kids were dressing up the street corner with Christmas lights (now I KNOW I dream in colour). The four of us had just done something, some prank, and were feelin’ mighty mighty. We sat on the floor in a circle, the guy across from me, the girls to my left and right. We got sort of touchy-feely, in a way that you are with your bestest friends. Brunette on my left produced a pan of blue finger jello, actually jello shots with vodka. Blue jello. Brunette suggested that Guy take a jello shot, place it in my cooter, and eat it. My pants just (click!) disappeared, and Guy did as he was told. He did it veeeery well, which seemed to inspire the girls. Brunette tried it, then Blonde, then Guy again, and Guy AGAIN, with the girls ‘oohing’ and ‘aahing’ all the way. Then Peekaboo Street (that skier chick, remember her?) slid down the patio door from the top and called to her friend, Brunette, who got up to talk to her. Guy and Blonde and I were in our little threesome, them slapping blue jello shots on my cooter fast as you please, all of us giggling and moaning and hootin’ it up.

The alarm interrupted my three-way.

THAT’S why I was pissed.

A-Ha Experience #427.

On a totally different note, today is my one-year blog-a-versary. One year! It seems to have flown by, and yet, not so much. Thanks for y’all’s support and readership, really, you're all terrific, and I'm a lucky girl (dabbing at grateful tears). Is there cake? Do we get a cake for this sort of thing? If not cake…jello??


At 6:44 AM, Blogger Martijn said...


How many articles did you write?
What got the most comments? How many comments did you get in one year. I started my blog about two months ago.

Kind regards,
Martijn Fransen

At 9:06 AM, Blogger Maine said...


At 1:58 PM, Blogger SVN, prn said...

A party for Mona!!! Whoohooo.

Let's see, first we need to do an evite and get all our fav bloggers there.

Then the decor. I'm thinking animal print/jungle theme.

Next, the food, jello shots seem to be on the top of the list.

Music, something dance-able.

Now I must get dressed. Boa, low cut shirt, mini-skirt and dancing shoes.

Are you ready Mona?

At 4:20 PM, Blogger jo(e) said...

Happy blogiversary! I can't believe it's already been a year.

Do the jello shots have to be blue?

In my dreams, they are always red.

At 6:52 PM, Blogger Rob said...

Can I be the official videographer of Mona's Happy Blog-A-Versary?! I promise I'll not miss a thing! Oh, can I also help make out the invitation list? I want to make sure all the right people are there when the jello shots get gobbled up! Well, OK. If you insist. I COULD put the camera down just long enough to do a few of those shots myself!

Congrats, Ms. Buonanotte!!! ;-)

At 11:17 PM, Blogger Mona Buonanotte said...

Martijn: 280 or so posts, the most comments were probably on something sexual. No matter how I start a post, they tend to slip that way....

Maine: Now I can't get the image of dancing vermin outta my head...chachacha....

svnprn: You got it, babe! Animal print, yes, jello, yes, boa, YESSSS!! And the music HAS to be funky, 'cause I plan on a bunch of bootie-shakin'!

jo(e): Blue is just an jello shots make your tongue look real purdy!

Rob: You can be videographer, and I have a tripod when you want to 'do a shot'!

At 6:01 PM, Blogger RunLuluRun said...

Happy Blog birthday!

You are amazing!!!

At 9:07 PM, Blogger Miss Sassy said...

I have a new respect for anything blue... how do you do that!!???

Happy Anni!!


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