Wednesday, August 15, 2007

Ain't Nuthin' but a Horn Dog

Two weeks.

I have two weeks until The Mister and I can engage in connubial bliss.

Sigh.

El Doctoro must first check out my girly bits, give me a wink and thumbs up, and send me back into the front lines of unbridled Hot Wet Monkey Sex. I can't wait.

I've been having very lifelike dreams since the surgery. Mostly sexy ones. The one last night involved me as a porn star with one of those CPR dummies at full mast. I woke up drippy and confused...how could I run the camera AND star in the damn film?

It doesn't help that I have become unfortunately addicted to stupid reality tv shows where sex seems to be the main ingredient.

Plus now 19-year old boys are starting to get my juices flowing. I'm so ashamed.

And so gooshy.

9 Comments:

At 4:28 PM, Anonymous The Cynical Girl said...

HOORAY FOR THE SEX DRIVE! HOORAY FOR NINETEEN YEAR OLD BOYS. HOORAY FOR FMLA. HOW MUCH LONGER UNTIL YOU CAN DRINK???

 
At 4:48 PM, Blogger Nancy Dancehall said...

Yeah, and did you see the promo poster for Equus?

I'm not helping, am I?

 
At 6:45 PM, Blogger Maggie said...

Well hell, with that much anticipatory angst built up, the first time should be an avalanche of orgasmic ecstasy.

In the meantime, cold showers? No not with your husband and no you can't take the 19 yo in with you either...heh

 
At 6:46 PM, Blogger Irrelephant said...

Er, could you be a little more specific, Mona? I don't think I'm quite sure what you're talking about...

 
At 7:23 PM, Blogger Orange said...

Nancy D, I saw a naked full-frontal picture of Daniel Radcliffe in "Equus." Is that the poster you're thinking of? With the penis?

Mona, last night I had an Obama dream. We were holding hands...only he was, like, 23 and living with his parents. And he was chubby. I blame Entertainment Weekly for showing a picture of a chubby young Jamaican rapper.

 
At 7:36 PM, Blogger Mother of Invention said...

Hope the heck you get the A-Okay! Maybe you can move the appointment up?!!! ENJOY!!

 
At 8:06 PM, Blogger Nancy Dancehall said...

The poster I saw was cut off at the waist. You saw Harry's wand, Orange? Damn!

 
At 9:12 PM, Anonymous Anonymous, too said...

Sounds like Sergei will be a very happy, very exhausted man once your doctor says you can shtup again.

Can Grandma take the kids that weekend?

 
At 11:21 PM, Blogger meno said...

What about oral connubial bliss. I mean, i think the restriction is just against puttin' anything in there, right?

Goosh on!

 

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