Mona's Barbaric Yawp
I am the tight fist of awesome.
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Sasquatch and S3x
Boy-child finished up 6th grade Reproductive Health lessons. Last night during tuck-in, I asked him (in a seemingly non-caring, non-pressuring way, ever-striving to be the open-minded, cool parent), what they learned.
"Well, we talked about peer pressure, and how everyone grows at their own pace. And how everyone goes through awkward stages. And we role-played, like this one guy had to stand in class and give a report, but he had, uh, a wet spot on his front, and how he handled it, stuff like that. Oh, and we saw pictures."
"Pictures?"
"Yeah. Of p3nises and stuff, and girl parts. They were just drawings, though."
"Oh yeah?"
"Yeah. The girls parts though? They were hairy! It was like Sasquatch! Oh my god! I can't believe anyone could have that much hair down there!"
Fortunately for me it was dark, and Boy-child couldn't see my shitty grin. Or read my thoughts, which went something like, "Oh just you wait, boy, just wait...you have NO idea."
"Sasquatch", Tenacious D (the F-word is in there somewhere, so beware):
Monday, March 09, 2009
Sweet Sexy Stevie Wonder
I was weaned on Motown and 70s funk. I still love the stuff. Sexy stuff. This morning on the Muzak at work, Stevie Wonder popped up, and I didn’t even have to reach for the words…”I’d like to see both of us/fall deeply in love/I’d like to see you in the raw/under the stars above.”
Two things hit me, allatonce:
1) Daaaamn, Stevie! That’s some sexy shit right there!
2) Daaaamn, Stevie! I’ll bet you’d like to see ANYTHING! (Is that rude? Probably rude. But he’s blind since birth, people…how wonderful would it be to have your first image be that of a beautiful naked lady under the stars?)
I could go on and on and on about this man, his connection to my home state, his influence, his sexyness. But instead I’ll leave you with these:
Boogie On Reggae Woman, a pretty terrif mashup of 70s female empowerment + t&a (I totally want to be Raquel Welsh):
Superstition (in the words of one commenter, “this song always makes me want to make love to the nearest person to me”...yeah, it gets me moist.)