Monday, November 28, 2005

Cyber Monday

Everyone in my geeky IT department is buzzing about it being Cyber Monday. After stuffing our maws full of Thanksgiving repast, and yet another slice of sweet ‘tater pie, apparently we remember how to shop like maniacs at the mall (which I did NOT do on Black Friday, thankyouverymuch…I don’t enjoy shopping in crowds), but we totally forget that there is this thing called…er…whatwuzit?...the Internets.

Then, after braving Rifle-Wielding Aunt Sheila and Slo-Poke Martha at BigTownMall, and finding a parking space in Bu-Fu, and dealing with screaming children and tantrum-throwing adults, and feeling dizzy ‘cause you forgot to drink any water, and remembering that the Dr. Bizarro Nasty Drink-Making Machine was $5 cheaper BEFORE Thanksgiving, folks boot up and turn to Amazon, or BestBuy, or whatevah.

And they do it today.

According to an online source, the National Retailers Federation says 77% of online retailers polled had significant sales increases last year on Cyber Monday.

So what did I do? Me, the only girl in the IT department, the mall-hater, the gift-obsesser, the slave to marketing?

I ordered online. Again.

And I’m awaiting with bated/baited/Bate-d breath, the arrival of last week’s online purchase of (mumblemumble) for Sergei.

Am I suggesting y’all logon and buy that box set of “Columbo Season 2” DVDs? Am I urging you to get a 2-gallon jug of Dr. Bronner’s Liquid Peppermint Soap and save yourself the trip to the Good Health store? Am I imploring you to visit that online Haus of Chocolate and buy yerself some sicky-sweet truffles?

You bet your sweet credit-card-holding bippy I am.



At 4:05 PM, Blogger Teri said...

Online shopping is the salvation of us crowd-haters, innit? But then, I'm a Scrooge anyway. Christmas, Shmistmus.

At 6:50 PM, Blogger Pisser said...

Nice use of "bippy". I thought only my grandpa used that, i.e. "I froze my bippy off." :)

So I'm not the only one who gets dehydrated while shopping and then feels really stoOpid about it. Thanks.

I want a Dr. Bizarro Nasty Drink-Making Machine. Then I want to soap my genitals up with Dr. Bronner's peppermint and get crazy on the kitchen table with Columbo blaring in the background, heh.


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