Wicked, Bad, Naughty Zoot!
Once again, I’m the dwarf under the fat girl today. Damn work. Damn marketing.
I promised a post on oral sex today. Okay. I don’t lie.
Which is a lie.
But not this time.
Here’s a short quiz for you on oral sex. On Mona’s history of oral sex. I can’t guarantee a prize, but I can feel that, perhaps, after this week of hell, there may be a boobie photo coming next week.
Question 1: In college, did Mona have/give oral sex with/to:
a) The head of the athletic department
b) A girl who lived down the hall
c) The entire men’s soccer team
d) The lead singer of INXS
Question 2: While going down on Sergei, does Mona think it tastes like:
a) Sweet wine
b) Salty chips
c) Whatever Sergei ate for dinner
Question 3: Does Mona prefer:
a) Giving head but not receiving
b) Receiving head but not giving
c) Giving and receiving but not at the same time
d) Giving and receiving at the same time like some sort of porn star/sex kitten
Question 4: When did Mona have her first ‘oral’ experience?
a) In elementary school, with the boy down the road, playing “doctor”
b) In middle school, in the gym, under the bleachers, before a jr. high basketball game
c) In high school, parked on a dirt road one mile from home
d) In college, after a drunken party the first weekend of freshman year
Oops. I was just busted by the programmer next door. Gotta run.
Oh, a joke by another programmer that he loves to tell: “Why is 77 better than 69?”
“Because you get 8 more.” “Ate.”
Guess ya gotta be there.