Let’s Get Physical

Oh I’m in pain.

It’s a good pain, one where all muscles, including my butt, are twitching and throbbing against the inside of my skin.

But I’m not convinced that it won’t kill me.

Back in January, Sergei and I both started dieting again. I did pretty well at first, lost 15 pounds in 6 weeks, and then…just sort of stalled. Nuthin’.

At first I blamed my thyroid meds, because my natural metabolism has turned to that of your average garden slug and the only way I can move/concentrate/poop is if my meds are doing their job. The blood tests showed I was pretty much within normal range, so I stopped obsessing about that.

Then I blamed my own lack of activity. With my work schedule, the kids’ activities, the volunteering, the laundry, the groceries, I didn’t find any windows for working out (unless I wanted to get up at 4 a.m. or start working out at 11 p.m., either way, NO). An occasional jaunt on the stationary bike or 30-minute walk just didn’t do it for me.

Then I blamed my diet. I did Atkins years ago and lost a good amount of weight. I thought, hey, that worked, I’ll try Atkins again. And while it’s working, sort of, it stopped working. Then I realized that Atkins says to incorporate carbs slowly back into your diet, and even though I hadn’t been eating pasta and bread and potatoes, those bags of cashews I noshed on were pretty fatty and caloric, and if you eat enough whole-grain flatbread crackers, the calories add up.

Well fack a dack.

My last blaming was Sergei. Sweet Sergei, who finds the time to work out and who has lost more than 50 pounds and is SKINNY. I mean like a stick. And yes, I’m jealous and I blamed him for MY lack of activity. So we decided it was time for me to find some time to work out.

While Girl-child was at the birthday party on Sunday, I went for a power walk. I huffed it to the high school and ran around the track plenty, then down some side streets, pumping my arms and legs, and made it back to the party one hour later, and felt GREAT. Red-faced and sweaty and panting. Walking is my workout of choice, as my knees are totally shot (and have been since I was a kid, they make that popping/scraping sound when I climb stairs).

Last night after the kids were in bed, while Sergei was working out, I did Tae-Bo, me and Billy Blanks sweatin’ and punchin’ and twistin’. Topped off with crunches and pushups.

My arms are cryin’.
My neck is twisting and throbbing (I can feel a muscle spasm back there).
My thighs are screaming “Holy facking hell, what did you DO?”
My butt…well, if you see me walking and my butt flexes at you with a sort of winking motion, don’t pay it no never mind.
I stepped on the scales this morning, and while I haven't gained any weight, I haven't lost any more either.

I’m giving up nuts for a while.

And I’m gonna call my doctor today to check my thyroid…because you just never know….