The Volunteer State

I’m just a girl who can’t say “No”.

When it comes to volunteering, I mean.

(How many were thinkin' I meant sex? Show hands.)

I will say “No” to these statements however:
“Would you put this beetle up your nose?”
“Mommy, can I use your bed as a trampoline?”
“Are you too tired to fool around?” (This, of course, is contingent on me being able to wake up first.)

For some reason, which I can only attribute to my parents' unending attempts to fill empty time with “stuff”, I volunteer. I am room-mother for Girl-child’s class, attend all field trips and functions, and am one of only 3 moms to have read the teacher’s note to send in Green Snacks for St. Patrick’s Day and actually follow through. I am helping coordinate the Big Field Trip for all the 5th grade classes at Boy-child’s school. I volunteer in the library every week. I am co-chief and general workhorse at the School Carnival this Friday (two days? Holy shnikees!), plus finding and collecting donations, and other suckers…er…I mean, volunteers, plus….

Well, you get the pic.

Sergei’s no better…coaching two soccer teams (gratis), heading up several Big City Committees (freebies), and generally being Mr. Helpful.

Two full-time jobs, two kids, a house, and endless volunteering.

Our kids don’t stand a chance.

They see what we do and are already bugging me to do more…”Can’t we volunteer to help at the Book Fair?” (Can’t…same time as carnival.) “Can’t we take more food to the Food Bank?” (Yes, but we also need to eat, darling.) “Can we take our old toys to Goodwill so other kids can have them?” (Yeah, but first I have to write everything down with an estimated value to use for tax time next year…don’t bug me! Go to your room!)

Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy it. I prolly enjoy it too much. Hence the propensity to volunteer for something, anything, when there’s the slightest lull in my schedule. Then I stress out, then I cut out the crap and DO it, then I complain that it’s done. WTF is my problem?

I’d always heard, “If you need something done, give it to a busy person.” Boy-howdy is that right.

Stress: Gits Shit Done.